Two weeks of isolation came to an end & we headed to the lakes. It's hard to describe how amazing it felt to be in the great outdoors after 14 days inside.
The change in my mental attitude was proof, not that any is needed, of the importance of fresh air and exercise on mental health. The sun shone, we walked and swam (*splashed about) in the lake. Then later we took Luna for her first pub tea. We were all happy. We talked about Lauren over tea. My son always loves talking about her, in a lighthearted "remember when Lauren did this" kind of way. Lauren's sister, who is the youngest by two years, sometimes finds it difficult when we talk of her. But I think it's good to keep her memory alive in our discussions.
Days like these show that happiness can return. Not contrived joy, but actual happiness. It's was impossible to imagine when Lauren first died that I could ever feel that way again.
It shows that life finds a way to survive grief if you let it, even when it may seem impossible.
I know that there will still be hard days ahead but I also know that I feel much better now I'm able to go out and live life again.
Repeat what feels good and avoid what doesn't.